So about this whole southern thing

As I've mentioned before, I spent the majority of my life oblivious to the fact that I was southern. I just thought I was normal.

Obviously I neglected how differently we do things (or say things) where I'm from - and tomorrow might just epitomize those differences.

Strange things happen in the south.

In the morning I have to give a presentation for one of my classes and the topic essentially revolves around rednecks, moonshine and the redneck dialect.

If it helps, this is the topic of my presentation.

People keep encouraging me to read some of the dialogue I wrote, but even though I chose the topic I am very weary of speaking in my natural dialect.

My insecurities with my accent stem back many moons ago to a time when I first realized I was different.

But as a side note I would like to mention that people like my brother-in-law think it's hilarious when people think I have an accent or am a redneck, because compared to him...

This was Thanksgiving 2008 at my brother-in-law's house.
Does this paint a picture for you about my comparable lack of redneckness?

Once I got into undergrad my accent became a daily topic of discussion. What I said, how I said it, my mannerisms while I said - every part of my life was picked apart constantly.

I became incredibly self-conscious about my southern attributes. For a while I even feigned a northern accent, can you imagine? And no, it did not go well.

But since I knew I could always anticipate that type of playful criticism (well not always playful) I began to play up my southernness.

I suppose I was essentially trying to beat everyone to the punch. So I would thicken my accent or discuss true, but unnecessary examples of my southernness.

But to this day when southern stereotypes are placed on me, even when I bring them on myself, I still feel a little tug on my heartstrings.

I'm proud of my accent, but I don't want to be perceived as ignorant, racist or dumb. As soon as I hear my accent thicken up all I can think is "lordy be, they're gonna think the dumb redneck has come to town."

See? So easy to go wrong.

I'm proud of my heritage, but I'm always nervous about the thin line between people being fascinated and people being condescending or just plain mean.

But bless your heart if you ever catch me when my accent is thick... you won't understand a blame word.